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Ding Dong

Driving into a small town Sunday, as the church bells rang out, I was reminded of my dear old grandmother, since passed. A few years ago upon hearing that my elderly grandfather had just passed away, I went straight to my grandparent's house to visit and try and comfort my 95 year old grandmother. When I asked how my grandfather had died, my gram replied, "He had a heart attack while we were having sex Sunday morning." Horrified I told my grandmother that I just couldn't picture two people nearly 100 years old having sex and it surely had to be asking for trouble. "Oh no, my dear, I love it !" replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age was gonna be a hindrance, I figured out the best time to do it was on Sunday when
the church bells would start to ring. It was just right rhythm for your granddad. Nice and slow and even and worked just fine. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong." As I looked on slightly stupefied at the revelation of my diminutive, saintly, Irish grandmother's penchant for sex, she paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "and if that damned ice cream truck hadn't come along, he'd still be alive today!"